I was given a paper to edit the other day. As I was reading through it, something in a sentence seemed off. I didn’t know if it needed a comma or maybe remove a word… I wasn’t sure. So, I entered it it Microsoft Word and it said everything looked fine. But something still looked off for me. Then, I went on Google to see if it was right. After a few clicks here and there, I found out… the sentence was fine.
This is when it started.
I read on and found another sentence that didn’t seem right. Again, I entered it in both Microsoft Word and Google and both said it was just fine. All the grammar was correct.
Every sentence I read after that, I had a panic attack. I no longer had the confidence in myself that I knew what I was doing. I was second-guessing every revision I thought of making.
I spent about a good 2 hours on the internet researching English conjunctions, clauses, prepositions, etc. I gave myself a whole new English lesson on things I already knew because the confidence wasn’t there.
I was getting myself worked up over nothing.
Finally, with my head about to explode. I pushed back away from the computer. Took a deep breath… worked on other things… and then came back to the paper.
I just trusted my instincts and my knowledge and suddenly, the paper was easier to revise. I found myself moving along and correcting as necessary.
After I returned the paper, I felt like I was me again. I felt like I knew what I was doing.
Sometimes, we create our own self-doubt. We don’t need anyone else to say or do anything because we’re already saying and doing it. We second-guess ourselves; we don’t trust ourselves.
But sometimes – believe it or not – we actually have a talent or skill.
Shocking, I know.
I went to school for English. I spent four years learning about it and been writing for years and years.
I might not know EVERYTHING about English but I know enough to edit a paper.
As the next papers come in to edit, I’ll just let my mind take over and trust it. To trust that I know what is right and wrong with grammar.
Don’t worry guys, I got this.